tanti auguri

We celebrated Luce's 4th birthday on Sunday. Here's a little glimpse of the festivities...

i am a my size barbie

With only a week left here in Staranzano, I think that now's a good time to reach some sort of conclusion about this summer and my experiences as an au pair in Italy. First of all, this is the best job that I've ever had, but it's coming to an end at the right time. I had no idea coming into this what to expect. I knew nothing about this family or this region of Italy. I also didn't know if I had the patience to deal with kids for 30 hours a week or the ability to conduct effective English lessons. I have learned that I have a whole lot of patience. I also have reconfirmed that my heart is bigger than Texas- I don't know how I'm going to leave these girls. It's truly been an incredible experience to live and function as part of this family for the past 2 1/2 months.

Here's what I did wrong- I never established an ounce of discipline with these kids. My philosophy is always to just shower everyone with love, which works great when those getting showered are receptive. I'm not saying that these kids aren't loving, but they are kids and I've learned that kids tend to be selfish to the core. I wouldn't say that I've spent the whole summer being taken advantage of either, but what I am saying is that my job title would more appropriately be "My Size Barbie that can move and talk" rather than au pair, teacher, or babysitter. Sure, these kids have learned a lot this summer, but they don't realize that at all. They still think that I'm a shiny new toy that came all the way from America to do tricks and entertain them. Having arrived only a week before the family's new cat, Neve, I can greatly sympathize with the torture that she has endured. Neve has also learned patience.



Only a few weeks ago I was teaching Ginevra the differences between the many titles for females. In order to demonstrate two of these, I said, "You are a girl. I am a woman." Her reply was, "No, Whitney, you aren't a woman. You're a girl." "No, Ginevra, I am a woman." "OK, You're a big girl." But that leads to what I did right- I am Ginevra's friend. She's had some issues with the girls at school this past year... You know, that age when the queen bees arise to suck out the souls of the weak. I remember being targeted myself... I was in the 5th grade and, according to the "mean" girls, I had head lice and wore high-waters (only the latter was true). As a big sister and a former victim of the insecurities of other females, I've been able to relate to Gine and many of her current struggles. She tried to run away from home a few days ago just to see if Luce would get upset. I immediately recognized this and did my best to coax along the appropriate response from Luce. After Gine successfully fit into my suitcase and told Luce she was heading to America with me, Luce was in tears telling her that she was sorry for whatever she had done and that she loved her. The whole thing ended with Gine sitting on the stairs, Luce in her arms, both girls crying and holding onto one another with all of their might. After it was all over, Gine said to me, "Whitney, I wasn't really going to run away. I just wanted to see if Luce really loves me." I told her that I knew all along. She asked, "But how did you know?" "Because I have a little sister, too."



So here's a little summary of the progress that we've all made together these past 10 weeks. I'm sure there will be a few additions after our 11th and final week...

Things that Ginevra has learned:
Present continuous tense
Simple past tense and many irregular verbs
Expressing future intentions using “going to…”
Prepositions of place, movement, and time
How to write a friendly letter
Synonyms, antonyms, and homophones (she’s even beginning to pronounce these words correctly!)
Plural forms of irregular nouns
Comparative and superlative adjectives
Giving simple directions
Talking about daily routines, the weather, hobbies, etc…
Common occupations and job titles
Body parts
Idiomatic expressions (her favorite is “It’s raining cats and dogs!”
Marco Polo, Simon Says, and I Spy
“The Hokie Pokey,” and “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes”

Things that Luce has learned/can say:
“It’s mine!!!”
“It’s my turn!”
“Stop!”
“Good morning,” “Good night”
“How are you?,” “Fine,” and “Thank you”
“I can do it”, “By myself”
“Help”
“Again”
“It’s ready”
Me, I, you, she, it (and sometimes she even uses them correctly!)
The verb “to be” (once again, sometimes she conjugates correctly!)
“Sooo cute!” (usually said in reference to Neve)
“Bad cat!” (once again, in reference to Neve)
Colors
Numbers 1-20
Letters (more or less, even though she screams her head off every time I try to sing the ABCs)
Body parts
Many basic nouns, including names of animals, toys, foods, places, and every day objects
The concept of “big” and “small”
Making comparisons using “bigger” and “smaller”
“Itsy, Bitsy, Spider,” “I Scream, You Scream, We all Scream for Ice cream,” “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes”
Simon Says

Things that I’ve learned:
Patience
Understanding
Humility
A few words in the "Gradese" dialect (only spoken in Grado and in our home)
How to say "thank you" in German
More French than I probably realize
The many uses of tea tree oil
How to teach English (more or less)
How to effectively bribe children (it has come in handy many times)
How to practice yoga in a very non-Zen environment (i.e. amidst screaming children)
How to make paper flowers
How to get rid of lice naturally
How to explain to children that just because you have breasts does not mean that you’re lactating (thank God)
How to make rice milk and almond milk (though I haven’t tried either yet)
How to gulp down a bottled beer in one swallow (I only witnessed this, but would be happy to show anyone the technique)
How to properly use and appreciate a bidet
The Italian postal service is more inefficient than that of most third world countries
Buses are only on time when you’re running late
You can find School House Rock and Sesame Street episodes on YouTube! (Ginevra loves them)
The Italian version of “Rock, Paper, Scissors”
Couch surfing is the only way to travel
Where to find falafel anywhere and at anytime of the day

not just any trip to the opera

Today I went to the opera, but let me start at the beginning. I should be in Ljubljana, Slovenia right now. I found someone to host me through Couch Surfing about 3 weeks ago and was really looking forward to meeting her and exploring the city, but well, that didn't go as planned. For some reason the automatic ticket machine at the station wouldn't give me a ticket and, shock of all shocks, there was no one working at the ticket window, so I couldn't go on my trip. I was slightly bummed but there's still that part of me that believes everything happens for a reason, so I told myself that I'd come up with something grand to do today (my free day). That's when it hit me- I'll go see an opera in Trieste!


So I decided to take the bus to Trieste first thing this morning. Once again, I didn't have a ticket and couldn't figure out where to buy one on a Sunday (everything is closed), so I decided to just hop on the bus and plead my case to the bus driver (similar to what I did last weekend when I rode the train without a ticket, but that's another story)... Anyway, it turns out he told me "va bene" and I had a free bus ride without even having to plea, cry, or yell (yelling is quite effective in Italy- typically whoever yells the loudest wins the argument. Oh yeah, as a side note, the customer isn't always right here). Trieste is beautiful. I can't believe that I've been so close to the city this entire time and only visited for the first time today. I spent the morning on the pier and later walked around the city. I somehow managed to find the way to San Giusto (a castle) without a map, but I guess not really because this homeless German hippie pointed me in the right direction. We had a nice chat about waiting for yellow submarines, travel, Buddhism, and just life in general.


Then it was time to find something for lunch. I walked around for a while and then I saw it- those trusted words that always ensure tasty falafel is only moments away- "KEBAB." After an hour of enjoying air conditioning (it's hard to find around here), listening to Turkish dance music, and reading "Catcher in the Rye," I decided that it was time to locate the theater. I found it alright but- I'm sure no one will be surprised by what's to follow- the ticket window wasn't opened. I eventually realized that something was wrong when the show was scheduled to start in one hour and there was absolutely no one in or around the building... right about then is when I met Attila. I asked him if he knew where I could buy a ticket and he informed me that the opera was at another theater! He was nice enough to accompany me there and we struck up a little conversation... Turns out that he's an opera singer and is performing in another opera that begins later this week. When we got close to the theater he asked me if I'd like to pay for a ticket or go in with him. What?! Get in for free?! I'll take that option, yes! He told me to keep quiet and stay close, so I did. He took me through the back door and we entered behind the stage. After wading through people, props, and cords, we made it to the front of the theater. Sensing that I was a little nervous about this whole stunt, Attila insisted that we share a coffee so that everyone would see us together and not suspect anything. Then we chose my seat, which changed a few times because some people actually had reservations. Finally one of the attendants caught on to the act and asked us if we had tickets. Lucky for me, Attila was who he said he was. He whipped out his special card that proved he was part of the opera world and told the woman that I was his girlfriend, although I'm not sure that she was convinced because he was easily 20 years older than me. She suggested that she show me to a seat that had not been reserved and walked me right up to the front row. I couldn't believe it!


The "operetta" (little opera) was called "Sissi" and told the story of Princess Sissi (as she's known in these parts) who was Empress of Austria and Queen of Hungary back in the mid-late 1800s. She's kind of a big deal around here. I'm actually not really sure what was happening because the opera was in German, but it was nonetheless amusing to watch and the music was just lovely. Anyway, Attila gave me his number and told me to get in touch with him if I want to see his opera this week... So maybe I'll actually see an Italian opera while I'm here.

I'd say that I had a nice experience in Trieste.

villach

Where to begin? First things first, Villach, Austria is one of the most beautiful places that I've ever visited, and it's hands down the cleanest place that I've ever seen. You can drink the lake water, seriously... I doubt that anyone has ever drank the water in Allatoona and lived to tell about it... I had my first couch surfing experience and it couldn't have gone more perfectly. My host, Nathalie, met me at the station with her friend Andrea. The two of them took me to a nice little restaurant in the city center (similar to downtown Athens in size) where we ate greek salad al fresco and sipped on something called "squash" (kinda like a non-alcoholic daiquiri). Then we headed to the local cinema for an international short film festival. Unfortunately, we missed the first half, but the films that we did catch were awesome (strange thing though- the films were all in different languages (mostly Arabic) but were shown with English subtitles, not German). Then we went to hear this Serbian band called Repetitor play. We were skeptical at first, but ended up having a lot of fun. The highlight of the night was this old guy (in his 70s) who whipped out a harmonica and started playing along (I forgot to mention that this was rather loud music). It was awesome.

So the next morning, I woke up to a beautiful spread on the table that had been prepared by Nathalie's mother... fresh baked breads, fruit, oats, honey, homemade jams, coffee... they don't make them like that in Italy. This family was beyond hospitable. After breakfast, they took me to Monkey Mountain. It was a little bizarre to see monkeys in Austria, of all places, but we had a great time and the park was beautiful. We then returned home for lunch- Nathalie's mom had prepared a traditional Carinthian dish that was comprised of fresh pasta (kinda like a dumpling) stuffed with creamed potatoes, garlic, and spices. It was delicious.


They also fed me some sort of cake that tasted like cinnamon raisin toast and Austrian chocolate. We left the house full and happy as we headed off to a little island on one of the lakes. I can't even begin to describe the view from the island. But even more impressive than the mountains was this lake... the water was blue! and you could see the bottom! and you could drink the water! Unbelievable. Ah, and we also ate apple strudel.



Unfortunately, I didn't have much time to spend in Villach. After the little island excursion, we had to head back to the station. I'm now convinced that couch surfing is the only way to travel. I was completely blown away by the hospitality and generosity shown to me by Nathalie and her family. I was a complete stranger and not only did they take me into their home with no reservations, they devoted themselves to making sure that I had an authentic experience of their city and culture. I hope that I can one day return the favor.

bzzzzz

I can't sleep. When I attempted to go to sleep at midnight, I discovered a mosquito in my room. Like any sane person, I chose to kill rather than be made prey throughout the entire night, but I was apparently unsuccessful. I woke up at around 3 a.m. to the sound of buzzing... and within the next few seconds had to dig the little sucker out of my eye. So with a swollen eye and a bite on my back, I jumped out of bed to seek my revenge. I'm assuming that I was more successful this time as I haven't heard or seen the little monster in several minutes... I hope I find a reliable mosquito net in Africa- I don't think I could deal with this every night.

Now that I'm here, I might as well say something about my day. I went to the market today in Monfalcone, which takes place every Wednesday in and around the main piazza in the city center. I went with a goal in mind- fresh tofu. That's right. After much research, I found someone in this neck of the woods that makes fresh tofu and seitan and also grows organic veggies and fruits. This probably won't sound like much to any of you, but I was quite happy to leave with the following treasures: 1 block of home-made tofu, 2 cucumbers, 4 white peaches, 2 ripe avocados, and 2 grapefruits. In honor of the fresh hunk of soy goodness that's going to supply me with much needed protein and amino acids, I give you an old and trusted friend, Tofu Baby...

gumball machine weekend

They say that home is where the heart is, but what if your heart is all over the place? A piece of mine is somewhere on I-85 listening to Yppah with Nick to my left and the night sky hovering above us. Another piece is sitting in the Rome airport listening to a stranger play classical guitar (maybe he's not such a stranger anymore, but I'll get to that part). A little piece is in meditation as Cathy spouts out profound, yet so simple, words of wisdom. I never knew that yoga could make you cry until I met her. There's so much beauty in simplicity. In presence. That's where my heart should be- in the PRESENT. In the here and now. Today that stranger in the airport told me (via facebook chat) that "here" isn't home to me because I'm not present. Another bit of my big gushing heart is already somewhere in Africa. And yet, I think the largest part of it is years in the future, somewhere on a little farm.

Proverbs 4:23 says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Everything that I do flows from my heart. It's my well-spring of life. What am I searching for when it's all right here? All beating right inside of my chest. It's beating right now telling me "this is life. this is home. this is all there is." There is nowhere to go and nothing to do. This is it.

So I guess it would only be fair to talk about Italy now, I mean, that's why everyone is reading this, right? I'm doing quite well. The girls have exceeding warming up to me- I'd go as far to say that now we're inseparable. The simplest moments are always the best... like when Luce pops her head into my room unexpectedly and just grins at me... or when she wraps her entire little body around my torso and tells me, "You mamma tiger and me baby tiger." When I'm not engaged in a rousing game of mamma tiger or monkey or shark, I've been learning French. So far, so good. I've also been devouring books, but that's been temporarily put on hold as I've read everything that I brought along, have already raided the English section of the local bookstore, and am awaiting a delivery from Amazon UK... I hope that Dostoevsky and Kerouac will be here to join me soon. I guess I'll end this post with a book recommendation. Everyone, and I mean everyone, go out into this beautiful world and find yourself a copy of Yann Martel's "Life of Pi." You can thank me later. (Thank you, Marla.)

whitney juan barcelona

It only took a bus ride to Monfalcone, a train to Venice, a train to Treviso, a bus to the airport, a plane to Girona, a bus to Barcelona, and a taxi to Carrer de Provenca for me to realize that I don't really know Brandon Hanick. I first met him two years ago during Athfest and now only know him in the context of two weekends. I heard his band (King of Prussia) play at the 40 Watt and somehow ended up having a long conversation with him. Following another small encounter and a message on myspace, I found myself just a few days later in his bedroom recording background vocals for his latest EP ("The Time of Great Forgetting"). Brandon moved to Barcelona the next day, and now two years removed, here I was at his doorstep. Juan and I didn't see much of him over the weekend, but we did catch him play a show at the Miscelanea on Friday night. I felt like I was home. Not really in a physical sense, it was more like the completion of something strange that began two years ago and had been floating around in space ever since looking for an end. Whatever odd bit of closure I had been seeking, I found in Barcelona.


Barcelona is beautiful. It was nice shaking things up a bit in a new country. I mean, I don't feel like I'm a tourist in Italy anymore... I speak the language, I'm familiar with the culture, the flow of everyday life, and so on. It was nice to be vulnerable again, to depend on a map and street signs to get places, and to trust that (in the case Juan wasn't willing to speak for me) someone would understand English or maybe a few Spanish words pronounced in an Italian accent (or maybe they were a few Italian words poorly pronounced in a Spanish accent). Regardless, nodding your head "yes" or "no" gets you places in any part of the world, except maybe in India (I hear they just bob their heads in little circles there).



We spent most of the weekend admiring the architecture of Gaudi. The Sagrada Familia was incredible. Gaudi designed the church and began building it in the late 1880s and it's still being built to this day. It should be completed in 2030, so Juan and I decided that we will meet back in Barcelona when we're both 43 to see the finished project. Guell Park was also great. Very whimsical. Unfortunately, we only had the funds to admire the facade of Gaudi's buildings, so we greatly appreciated and took advantage of the park's free entrance. When we weren't searching for one of Gaudi's buildings, we were looking for vegetarian food. We found a few great veg restaurants, one was even completely vegan, but we also ate a lot of falafel. Thank God for deep-fried chickpea mash and the gracious souls who sell the stuff all over Europe. We also drank a lot of fresh juice (coconut-kiwi was my favorite). Ah, and then there was sangria, which is not so typical of Barcelona, it's more of a rest of Spain kind of thing... which is probably why we were charged 30 euro for only two glasses, but I'm trying to forget that.



Now I'm back home in Staranzano. The girls have finished school for the year, so now our play schedule will be a bit more flexible. The rest of the summer will be pretty quiet, dedicated to my yoga practice, reading, improving my Italian, and learning French (required by the Peace Corps, assuming I receive my final placement in West Africa). I'm focusing on being aware, present, centered, and calm. Very calm.